A Stripper’s Guide to Bristol.

A Stripper’s Guide to Bristol.

Head over to Coochie Crunch for my guide to Bristol aimed at travelling performers.


Valentine’s GlossyBox Unwrap

Valentine’s GlossyBox

I’ve been waiting with bated breath for this to arrive this week. I’ve been a little on the gloomy side and have been really looking forward to this little treat. And what with it being the Valentine’s special I knew it would be a good one, unfortunately last month’s box left a lot to be desired but they’ve saved themselves with this one.

P1150299My first reaction was ‘This is a good one. This is a very good one’, said out loud to my poor ill husband who is on the sofa with me. Look at all those full sizes!!

P1150300Toni & Guy Creative Stick It Up Gum, I’ve been thinking about some new hair product for a while and this is spot on for my short back and sides and big long quiff on top.

P1150301I rarely use eyeliner pencils, generally sticking to liquid liners for a cat eye flick, however this product really intrigues me. Maybelline Master Kajal in pitch black, it has that unforgettable Indian/Middle Eastern style khol liner look to it. I know this is not going to be one for precise application or a cat eye flick, but I think it could be great for a Theda Bara looklook.


Now I’m not a big red wearer, in burlesque it’s the typical look…red nails red lips and whatnot. But I like to buck trends and and avoid the typical colours in favour of things like metallic green or rich purple. Buuuut knowing how good Ciaté are as a brand I will definitely give this one a try. The shade is Hot Chili and is an orange toned red, or vermilion as I would call it, and reminds me of Chinese lacquer wear.

P1150305Now this is one I’m not so confident about. It looks and smells a bit teenage. But I do like a nice sheer pink gloss so it could layer well. It’s Miners Cocktail Kiss gloss in Manhattan.

P1150306This is Body Shimmer by Nougat, supposedly in ‘Cherry Blossom’ but just smells vaguely floral/sweet, I’ve tried a little on the back of my hand and is no where near sparkly enough for on stage but could provide a good base for body glitter to stick to. Not feeling too confident about this one either but it could mix well, I may be able to salvage it by adding some loose glitter or shimmer powder.

P1150307And last of all is a nice little treat, Lindt Lindor bar which I shared with poor husbear. Firm milk chocolate and smooth filling, yummy!

So I’ll try and do some more in depth reviews when I get round to trying these all properly.

Ally Katte



February’s Beauty Loves

As I’m working towards getting into makeup and beauty more I thought I would show all you guys some of my current makeup favourites!

February’s faves from ELF, Jelly Pong Pong, Too Faces, L’Oreal and Crown Brush.

Eyes Lips Face, or ELF, are an amazing budget brand. Their products are stupid cheap, cruelty free and great quality considering the price. This 100 piece pallet was bought in the sale for £7.50 and is still available at that price now! Even at it’s full price of £15 it’s still a bargain. There are some odd marbled shades, and personally I’m not really sure what that marbling effect really achieves but the colours are all really great, there are some lovely jewel tones, lots of nice neutrals and a mix of matte and shimmer shades.

Eyes Lips Face 100 piece marbled pallet.

Please don’t judge, yes I use L’Oreal. And the Superliner Blackbuster is pretty darn good so far, I don’t use felt tip style liners very often and I like to get out of my comfort zone when it comes to my makeup so I thought I’d give it a go. It keeps it’s intensity well, has a nice sharp point but it is very chunky so delicate flicks are not an option. Luckily for me I subscribe to the ‘bigger the better’ school of eyeliner.

Forgive the dodgy picture, it’s a tricky one to capture.

I’ve recently become a total convert to the idea of primers. I thought it was just another product being hawked by beauty companies but after trying it they really make a difference. I had the good fortune to actually win a tube of Too Faced Original Shadow Insurance, it’s more expensive than I would normally splash for on an item like this so I really lucked out. It’s a beige toned primer that really does help bright colours stick and stops any creasing.

Too Faces Shadow Insurance

I’m not much of a red lips kind of girl, it’s so common in burlesque that I like to stay different and usually go for pinks and nudes with occasional purples here and there. This Jelly Pong Pong Lip Frosting is a really nice shade, it’s less Barbie on the lips than on the hand. My only problem the tube doesn’t apply easy and like most glosses it’s not exactly long wearing. But it smells amazing and layers really well with dark colours! I got this in a GlossyBox last summer and it’s lasted me this long! It’s a shame they don’t have more flavour/colour combos in the range as a full desert range would be gorgeous! After a browse of their website I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to try more of their products.


Jelly Pong Pong’s delicious Lip Frosting

And finally we have my Christmas present from my lovely parents, my Crown Brush 7 piece HD Set. I love this set! The foundation brush is unusual, not what I’m used to, but works really well. The powder brush is just so so soft and so so big, I love! The liner brush hasn’t seen that much use yet, I’m a total liquid girl so I’ve not had call to. The brushes are best for liquid and creams so the shadow brushes don’t pick up lots of powder, so not great for really out there looks but great for more subtle, blended looks. The metal pallet and spatula haven’t have any use yet, but I’m hoping to give covered eyebrows a try soon so maybe they will get pulled out for that.

7 piece HD set from Crown Brush.

Most of these got brought out for my Introduction to Creative Makeup workshop that I lead last weekend and will continue to be in the future.


So, thanks for reading! I’m going to try and do a bit more beauty blogging in the future so stay tuned!


Fortune Favours The Bold

I have severely neglected this blog. I have mostly been using Facebook to keep my quoteunquote fans updated with every thought that passes between my ears. And a few contributions to Coochie Crunch, the website run by my sister-from-another-mister Tuesday Laveau.

So I suppose this is one of those obligatory new year blog posts that us social media addicts feel so compelled to write.

2013 started out pretty shitty, I was still in the midst of a bad period of depression and had quit my dayjob. So that was a really tough period to deal with, I lost a great deal of my creativity and had no enthusiasm for dancing.

Buuuuuut in around April I was asked to come on board with the Bristol Pride Afterparty, Horseplay presents Plastic, to come up with ideas for gogo performance art and the costumes to go with them. So that took up a big chunk of my life for a few months, as well as performing at various other shows.

September 1st saw my first wedding anniversary and my wonderful husband took me for a surprise trip down to London to see an amazing and inspiring production of Alice in Wonderland by Iris Theatre.

October was finally time for the fantastic Bristol Burlesque Festival, it was their first year and they did outstandingly.

Then through November and December Tuesday Laveau and myself were in devising and rehearsal stages of our first double act together! We made our debut at Coochie Crunch Christmas at Bristol’s Smoke and Mirrors, and then did it a second time at Cabaret of Curiosities at The Cube Cinema. Tuesday and I also saw the new year in together at Mr Wolf’s, dancing with two awesome live bands – The Radio Nasties and 45’s.

In 2014 I’m going to try and embrace the phrase Fortune Favours The Bold. While I am hardly a wallflower I do struggle with actually putting myself out there to get shows. I fell into a massive rut of just waiting for producers to come to me rather than actively look for shows myself and barely travelled outside of Bristol.

So this year is the year for going further afield and try and get international.

copyright David Hammonds
copyright David Hammonds

Photo a Day week 1

I decided to do photo a day starting as of 5th August 2013. My plan is to take photos each day with either my camera on my phone and post on the Wednesday after, I was going to do Monday posting but as you can see already I’ve fallen at that hurdle!  

So! On with the show…



One for Vigilant Citizen


All Hail…my awesome earrings



Thick shakes at Atomic Burger, Bristol


Rusty Snuffletron the Squeakerbot


The birthday boy at @Bristol



Maddie is visiting…


…and these guy’s ain’t happy. 




Comings and goings this February.

It was a quiet month for performances at AKHQ.

I performed as part of a troupe for the first time alongside fellow Bristol birds Lou Leigh Blue and Delilah Di Sgrace for the best queer night out, Horseplay at the Lakota nightclub.

I’m also moving house so any creation and organising has had to be put on hold until mid March!

I’m almost done with my Courtesan – now known as The Aristokatte – Costume. All that is left to do is finish wrapping lace around my pannier straps, make a tulle over skirt, source some shoes and possibly make spats to go over them, make a ruffled bollero and make two choker style necklaces, one in red latex and one in white lace.

Wow…now that I write it all down there’s actually a whole lot more to do than I thought!

I’m being sensible though, and haven’t booked it for anything sooner than August…thus far.

After we have moved I also need to finish putting together some new choreography for one of Tiger Tiger‘s awesome shows, Funk Me at The Gryphon in Bristol. I’ll be using my classic styled red costume from my Vesta routine.

THEN after my husband and I have been to France I need to finish a costume I’ve been working on which will double as an outfit to wear to Priscilla Queen of the Desert, and make the husbear an outfit too.

Aaaaaaaand then I will be putting together another brand new routine for Tiger Tiger again, for her big fancy show Hola Bonita! At Trinity, Bristol. This routine will be a tribute to one of my favourite artists, I won’t reveal just yet but if you follow me on pinterest you may be able to guess!

And I’ll leave you with a picture of me and my pal Jenny, who is a burlesquer in the making currently studying with Pink Kitten. The wonderful headdress, backpack and panties were provided by Mitzy Bear, one of the Godmothers of Bristol burlesque, for a charity event for St Werburghs Community Centre.


picture copyright of Andy Valentine